Warm Water Dissolves

You stand, elbow deep in soapy scum

the wreckage of the day flows beneath you.

every bite,

every crumb,

washed
            
              away.


"So simple," you think.

so, you take your sore, sore heart

soak it,

wring it out.


Warm water dissolves the pain;
it makes your heart beat again.

Insurance Policy

I've never had enough money to afford insurance. In fact, I've never owned anything worth insuring. Current state of my life: 26yrs old,  living with parents, babysitting for money. A sad state of affairs if I were to dwell on it too long. However, a recent visit from my parents' pastor showed me that insurance needn't be expensive, it is as simple as a state of mind.

Imagine me, in my current mental unrest, sitting amongst those, who seem all too eager to convert me and to my surprise believing that it would take no real effort at all. I am told I should believe "just in case".

Just in case?! Really?

In case there is a God. In case the world implodes and my non beliefs aren't a comfort.

I was extremely insulted by "just in case", because I honestly believed I deserved a better, more well thought out argument as to why I should believe. Did they really think I was that lazy? That when given the easy way out I just would? Their belief strategy would require no real effort on my part, no commitment, in actual fact, no belief at all. It would be the illusion of a belief.

It's the cheapest insurance policy I've encountered yet, pay it off with some self deception and you've made it into heaven. Seriously, such a cheap payment makes God seem cheap. Poor God!

Sometimes I write Poetry

I bet you never knew I wrote poetry. I bet you never knew I wrote such bloody awful poetry. In actual fact I wrote this as a song:

Girl

What are you waiting for?
Some kind of sign?
A man maybe, the generous kind?

Your jeans and your hair
they're not your own.
The language that you use,
the way you pose
From someone else you stole.

Girl, Girl, Girl!!!
Could you tell me why?
The mirror you use is pointed at the sky.
You pretend that the stars are your eyes,
and that your lips they shimmer and mesmerise.

Girl, Girl, Girl.
I know you're not a fool!
Discard the lies they taught you at school.
Your people and your life they never knew.
The truth thay could never give to you.

............

It's no Austen or Eliot, but they're white and I'm not, so it's okay :)

Hedgehogs of Love

I am a hedgehog. The one on the right to be precise. If you see my other half please let me know.

Comfort - Food

So, right now I'm in the mood for a lovely, rich cup of hot chocolate.

Something very much like the above image would go down very well at this moment. This has become my latest interest. Making hot chocolate, making good hot chocolate. I've tried a few batches and really it's not that difficult at all. Dead simple, but so warm and soothing that you feel a bit guilty that you haven't put more effort in. All you need is some good chocolate, full cream milk, or cream if you want to be decadent, or rather more decadent. Since I can't afford "good chocolate" on a regular basis, it's a treat. And I can't really explain how good it feels to sit under the covers, after a tiring day, with a mug of chocolate. It's like a hug. It forces you to respond to it, you can't ignore it. Another variation, which does require slightly more effort than mixing warm milk and a few slabs of chocolate, involves making a simple custard and adding the chocolate to that. It's somewhat smoother, still delicious, best thing is you can shove it in the fridge, overnight, and you'll have a chocolate pudding. That's the thing about chocolate, unlike people, it's likable hot or cold.

Boots!

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